D minus 9 days – ahh God bless Yorkshirisms

In the past few days, I’ve really started to notice things about where I live, which I previously either chose to ignore, took for granted, or just didn’t notice.

The Peter & Paul show

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Peter Levy and Paul Hudson. Anyone who watches the BBC News coverage will know exactly who I’m talking about and, those who don’t, it’s worth a google (if you’re bored) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0qMRt68olU4.

These two used to co-present Look North every week night. Well, in fairness, Peter used to present and Paul was the mere Weatherman, but the banter between them was brilliant. Think of Ant & Dec doing a local tea-time news show… double entendre, subtle piss-taking about ties and shoes, hints of late night antics etc… you get the gist. Well Look North soon got renamed in our house as ‘the Peter & Paul show’ and was the source of much entertainment. Clearly BBC Leeds thought otherwise, as Peter was soon relegated to Radio (nothing to do with ‘that nose’ surely?) and Paul still does the weather, and seems to be something of an icon? Or is that just me?

Tea or dinner?

This brings me to another anomaly… the meal which one generally consumes between finishing work and going to bed… the one where the whole family sits round the table (well, if you live on a farm maybe, otherwise debatable, albeit desirable, right?) What do you call it? Tea? Dinner? Supper? What’s the distinction? If it’s Dinner, then what do you eat around midday? You eat later than midday?!… This is a debate which has been ongoing from the day I joined the Leeds office.

Other similar peculiarities include references to timing, like “Spooks is on 9 while 10”. No it’s not! It’s on from 9 until 10. ‘While’ (in my book) means a static period of time (eg Spooks will be on for a while), not a duration or movement in time. Or am I just being pedantic?

According to the Southerners in the office, this is technically referred to as ‘a Yorkshirism’. Another is saying ‘I were…’ or ‘He were…’ instead of ‘I was…’ or ‘He was…’ – simple grammar or local dialect? God knows, and as Yorkshire is God’s own Country, it’s anyone’s guess.

Tollertopolis – road rage with a Massey Ferguson

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If you live in York, and work in Leeds (around 30 miles away), you can leave home and be in the office in 35-40 minutes.

If you want to go shopping at Monks Cross, or the Designer Outlet, you can get in the car and drive there, park for free, grab a coffee on arrival, buzz round the shops and be home within the hour. Or if you want to shop in the city centre, you can take a leisurely walk into town, maybe see a few buskers or a military parade en route, and be home again within the hour.

When we had 6 inches of ‘surprise’ snow a couple of months back, I drove up to my parents to watch my dad playing in a gig, and on the way home I passed the Lord Mayor and his Mrs in their stretch limo, she was leaning out of the window laughing directions at the 3 or 4 chaps who were pushing their tractionless car up the road in the snow… only in Yorkshire!

So when the locals arrive at a mini roundabout in a market town, and actually have to WAIT for more than one vehicle, they can start to get a bit frustrated. Especially when said vehicle is a Massey Ferguson… If there’s one thing I learnt from my brother was that if you’re going to buy a tractor, get a John Deere! Yes seriously, there were horns! It was brilliant!

So for my remaining 9 days in Yorkshire, I’m going to look out for Yorkshirisms… watch this space!

Heyupster, seethe… Bxx

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