So I’m back at T5, again. I feel like a piece of lost luggage on a carousel – no hang on, the luggage never actually got to T5 did it? Or did it get stuck there and never reach its intended destination? Not that anyone knew where that was, did they? Who knows, I don’t think BAA did at the time, maybe that was the problem?…

Anyway. I’ve now successfully made my way back here for the third time in a month, only this time it is me hopping on a plane!

The first time I experienced T5, was something of an expensive affair. The day I landed from Honkers, a friend was flying out to Asia on business, so we arranged to meet for a swift sherbet as our paths crossed. After a sociable glass of Prosecco and a G&T, the usual question was posed: “one for the road?” This proved to be the most expensive glass of Prosecco in history…

Has anyone ever heard / seen / read the ‘rule’ which says that, once you’ve checked in your luggage, you have to go through security within 30 minutes of it? Or that if you’ve checked in your luggage, you have to through security at least an hour before your flight departs? I’ve heard of being at the gate 30 mins before departure but never been stopped at security, and told your luggage has been offloaded!

Well we still dispute that this advice is published anywhere, but a replacement flight (not claimable on expenses) cost a mere 4-figure sum… I am therefore under strict instructions today to avoid the Prosecco bar at all costs!

My second trip to T5 was a far quieter occasion. In fact, I wondered if the terminal had actually opened yet, as it was Deadsville Tennessee. I was meeting the olds on their return from hols. They were flying with Qantas, but their UK flights were operated by BA. So, given that BA uses T5, they’d be coming into T5, right? But as a Qantas flight, they flew out of T3. So where would they land? Oh god, it’s the lost luggage feeling again… So, typical
Wallin; use your noddle and check the BA website – and there it was: due in on time at T5.

So I parked in the T5 car park and jumped into the lift… Hang on, big sign reads “For Qantas arrivals, please use T3″… Ok now I’m confused. Not that it’d make a difference, I check the website again… T5 (although quite how the existence of a status sign would affect the web content, I don’t know, but it made me feel better.) So, plan B: check the arrivals board: great, it tells me their flight has landed and luggage is being unloaded (how novel?!) but no reference to at which terminal. Given that I’m standing in T5, you’d think it was here, but this is T5, nothing is a given, especially not when luggage is being unloaded! So I try plan C: find an information desk, preferably one which has a person at it. Its my lucky day, I find one with two BA ladies in attendance. I present my dilemma and ask if the flight has landed here or over at T3. Classic, one says “if it’s a Qantas flight it’s T3″ whilst the other says if it’s operated by BA it’ll be here” – how very helpful! I show them my iPhone with the BA website saying its T5 but Doris and Doris can’t see the flight on their system. Joy. By this point, whilst its little after 5am, the Prosecco bar upstairs is seeming ever more appealing! However, I figure dad will want an Espresso when they land, so I take up camp in T5’s Costa and within minutes they appear.

All fun and games, but a point proven; if in doubt, alcohol is fun but can end up costing a fortune – the morning after, coffee’s a better bet!

Right, where’s the bar?…

ttfn /R xx