So Dad sets off from Yorkshire on Tuesday morning, to arrive in London around lunchtime… Yep, well it kind of went a bit pear shaped there.
The fuel tank on a motorbike being smaller than a car means you have to stop more often to fill up. So Dad got as far as Peterborough services (90 miles from home) and pulled in to fill up, only to discover his bike battery had died. Or rather it hadn’t been charging properly since leaving home. Bugger.
No it’s ok, he’s called the Caravan Club. What? Turns out Dad has a comprehensive insurance policy with the Caravan Club, which covers him for bike breakdown. Great!
Well not quite – all our luggage is in panniers and tank bags designed to fit a Triumph Sprint ST, so they won’t fit on another (replacement) bike. Fuggerella.
No it’s ok, the Caravanners can get him a car instead… Except the ferry is booked for a motorbike and two passengers. Do they have room for an extra car? Yes… hurrah! …for an extra £205. Flippety bollox.
But guess what, the Caravan dudes will cover that as part of Dad’s policy. Bonus! So ok, driving across Spain in a hire car isn’t quite the same as riding on the bike. But we’re getting a Polo – it’s German, it’s a little hatch, it’ll handle the windy little mountain roads of Northern Spain, so we can still take the scenic route with some fun, right?
Erm not quite. They couldn’t get a Polo in the end, so we’ve got a Vauxhall Insignia. What? You’re joking! The car Mum and Dad have at home? The car they do nothing but moan about? The car that breaks down on them at least once a month? The car Mum convinced Dad to buy, and now can’t convince him to replace?
I knew the Caravan Club were no good! #bloodycaravans
I jest, but it’s not all bad. We meant to leave on Tuesday, it turns out to be Wednesday, so what? A bike turns out to be a car, but a scenic ride over the mountains turns into a booze cruise! And packing light turns out to include a rucksack, two cases, three handbags, four pairs of shoes, numerous scarves and a rainbow of nail colours and manicure kit… Of course it does!
Apparently, the word of the moment is #agile – plans change, goalposts move, bikes break down and there’s always a caravans leading the mayhem. But if anyone wants any wine or beer bringing back from Spain, we have an Insignia Sports Tourer to fill! Orders please…